I think we can all agree that Maine compared to most other regions of the world is relatively safe. Some of Maine's appeal is that crime rates are low, populations aren't as dense, and diversity is minimal. Maine truly is a great state to live in and raise children.

With that in mind we all have a tendency to become complacent. Complacency can be dangerous. Maine although safer than some places; is no stranger to violent crime and sick wacko residents.

We at MaineMates would like to keep our members safe. It would be appalling to wake up some morning and see on the news that one of our members has suffered a devastating fate from use of our service. There are things to consider when meeting people on the internet and you all must take steps to keep yourselves safe.

Here are some tips to remember that will help keep you safe:

1. Never give out personal information to strangers.
While the essence of dating is to mingle with lesser known people you should never give out your personal information to strangers. If you find someone you are interested in take it slow. Start with email correspondence or maybe 1 on 1 chat. Test these people in every way that you can. Be a detective, be suspicious, ask fact finding questions, and scrutinize answers.

2. If it sounds too good to be true, it is.
Finding a new special someone can be completely euphoric. Sometimes we can be so wrapped up in an individual that we will justify things that just don't seem to add up. When a situation is perfect you're doing something wrong. Nothing is perfect. No one is perfect. Keep in mind that if it sounds to good to be true, it is. Take a step back and re-evaluate or gain a different perspective.

3. Never meet for the first time alone.
Even if you feel completely comfortable don't do this. Typically a first meet should be nothing more than a friendly get-together. If nothing else you can gain some perspective from your mate's friends. Make it a double date, or ask them to come hang out with you and your friends. Make sure your meet will be in a well populated public area preferably during daylight hours. Never allow a first meet to be at a club or a bar or anyplace where alcohol will be consumed.

4. Get all the facts.
Sounds simple enough, but don't over simplify this step. It's o.k. to know who you are dealing with. You can never go to far with this. Everyone has skeletons, find out what they are. We recommend you conduct a background check and we are currently working to make this service available to our clients. Ask the person about their skeletons, get their side. You are not out of line by checking public records.

5. Be honest with yourself.
Why are you seeking a relationship? What have you learned from failed relationships? Look at the big picture. Where do you see your life 5 years from now? 10 years from now? Does your match have the same ambitions? Do you have problems that effect your judgment? Are you taking steps to correct these problems?

6. Take it slow.
Anything rushed suffers in quality and lacks in safety. Rushed sex is not fun, rushing in your car can kill you, etc. It's o.k. to take your time and do things right. If they are pressuring you tell them to back off or completely reject them. Typically internet correspondence should last 2 weeks, more intimate phone correspondence should last a further 2 weeks, casual dating for another 6 months, and then if everything feels right and there are zero red flags go ahead and take it up a notch.

7. Take control.
Don't allow yourself to bargain your integrity. Don't back down. Stick to your plans. If it's not meant to be then it's not meant to be. Don't allow yourself to give in to a suggestion that you are not completely comfortable with. Don't allow yourself to become submissive. Be in control at all times.

8. Inquire about health.
Physical and mental. You have a right to know what you are getting into. Know up front that you wont contract a life changing condition. Be receptive to signs of mental problems. Dating should only be attempted by mentally stable people. Don't allow yourself a new project. Support in a relationship should come from both sides. Value your virtue and request testing for STD's. Why take a chance?

9. Consistently evaluate the present.
On a regular basis ideally every week, take a step back and look at your situation. Are you happy with the way things are going? Why or why not? Do you have any concerns? Why or why not? Ask your friends. Your friends will not be drugged with puppy love and will be more apt to see the big picture. Consider seriously what they have to say.

10. Have a voice.
The foundation to a great relationship without a doubt is communication. Talk, talk, then talk some more. Talk until you can no longer push breath through your lips. Express who you are in an honest manner. Don't be afraid to speak up when you feel the urge. If you feel that you speaking up will compromise the relationship then end it. If you can't talk now what makes you think you will be able to speak up when it matters?

There you have it, 10 steps to a healthy and safe search. Please keep these in mind when your out there on the battlefields. It could save your life or years of grief and wasted time.

Always remember; common sense goes a long way.